Tuesday, December 29, 2009

New to dating, and unsure?

so for one reason or another i haven't really dated at all in my life. i've been trying to change that for the last little bit now and have finally found a girl to date. I met her on a sports team that i joined and have spent a fair bit of time talking with her at the pub after game. And we've been on one date (my first one ever) before but it was more of an activity date and we didn't really get much of a chance to talk. Now the issue that i'm having is that im not really sure what to do on dates. and if i should tell her that i have absolutly no experience dating. she's really shy and in her shell, but i think that she likes me otherwise she wouldn't talk with me as much as she does. should i try telling her that i don't know what i'm doing in the slightest? and what is to be expected on dates with her in the terms of events and conversation? thanks,.



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I really don't think you need to tell her that you've never dated. That's going to make her wonder "why". Not good!



Just be yourself, and do whatever comes natural.



You don't have to do any one thing, right or wrong.



Just whatever feels right at the time.



If you're too nervous, then it's better to just wait and not make a move until the next date, or whenever you will feel more comfortable.



Don't push anything, just take it nice and slow.



Enjoy getting to know her better and letting her get to know you.



Just be yourself :D



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B honest and tell her the truth.



She's shy so r u, being honest i think she'll respect u more.
tell her you are shy and nervous. see may see your honesty and like that in you. just spend time with her and don't consider anything as a date. eventually if things work out there will be something more.
You are supposed to get her drunk and try to get her in bed. Where have you been??
sure you can be honest with her, it could make things easier for you on your dates. she won't feel that she is doing something wrong. when on your date try to stay calm and talk about things you have knowledge about, such as movies, music, sports.
Well, its always best to ask questions about her because most girls love talking, talk about her favorite teams, hobbies, her day, her job, anything, and if she asks something about you answer the question, then ask something about her. Girls usually don't like a guy who just boasts about himself or just talks about what they want to talk about. So keep the options flowing.
ask her out for another date. somewhere quiet like for dinner. find out what her interests are other than sports. then after dinner say you have a confession to make and tell her you havent had much experience dating. she will be greatful for the honesty! dont rush though - its best to get to know her a bit before a kiss - but a goodnight peck on the cheek is permitted for the first few dates.
The best romantic date that I have been on is that me and my boyfriend sat under a blanket on the couch and watched a movie it is so much fun!!! Just tell her that she looks beautiful tonight and what she did all day. It's a really good conversation starter.
Talk about hobbies. It worked for me.
Sure. Take a whack at it. Tell her what you just told us. "I really have no experience dating.." but add something to sweeten the sour, "... but I'm really glad I'm on this date with you..." Girls like the sweet stuff. But sporty girls might just be different. Remember, if you really want to go on a date where you are talking, center the conversation around her. Girls naturally like to talk, so keep asking questions and she'll probably give you long winded answers. All you have to do is nod and add a few personal experiences to show her that you are paying full attention. Humans are naturally selfish, so when another person is focusing on you, you'll naturally feel enlightened. Just make sure you do things to HER liking. And if she's a bit shy, start reminising, "This one time... I was with my friend and the most hilarious thing happened...." Once you get well into your conversation, it's ok to ask silly questions, "Do you like milk?" "What's your favorite color" "if you were stuck on a desert island..."



Just make it all about her and you'll be smooth sailing.
Hi...



i'm glad to hear you've found someone to date.



there are no "rules" about dating, but there are things you don't need to talk about which include:



the fact that you're insecure and nervous and you dno't know what you're doing (EVERYONE is a little nervous when they first get together with someone, so it's not abnormal).



past dating history, and breakups...



negative things about yourself.



DO ask her about herself... what does she like to do? does she have hobbies? take an interest in her, and she will respond in kind.



You can let her know what you like to do, but don't spend the entire time talking about yourself -- if you are interested in her as a girlfriend or someone to date, then act interested!



Take it slow.. no rush... if there are moments of silence, that is normal, too!



The two of you can figure out what kind of dates you might like to have in the future... there are all sorts of things to do, so between the two of you, i'm sure you have mutual interests...



have fun!! don't sweat the small stuff! hugs
I think that it's okay to tell her that you lack experience. It doesn't really mean anything or change anything because you haven't dated before. She doesn't like you because you have a lot of experience so I wouldn't feel to self conscious about that.



As for what's expected on dates, there isn't a lot you can expect. It's okay to try and plan out fun things to do on dates but mainly you should just be out to enjoy the person's company. Things will flow naturally the more time you spend together, including conversation.



It's always safe to ask questions about your date and that will start conversations but as you know more then it will progress into more natural conversations like what you did that day, or you did something really funny or embarrassing.



But silence is perfectly acceptable too and you won't always have something to talk about or to say. In those cases, really just try to enjoy the person you're with. And it really will come together and just progress naturally.



Good Luck.
Usually the first few dates are spent getting to know each other better. Pick places that you would feel the most comfortable with. You might prefer movie and dinner, or maybe something with more going on like a sports event or something. But always try to spend some quiet private time, like at a restaurant, to talk and get to know each other. Rather than say you don't know what you are doing as far as dating goes, just let her know you haven't dated that much recently because you've been really busy or something. It is always a bit nerve racking the first 2 or 3 times you go out, but after that, if you both click, then it gets a lot more comfortable and things will come a lot more natural to you (and probably her too).

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